"I don't fucking get you Lennon! He can't play, he doesn't even face the crowd!" I pushed him, angrily. "You're the one that's so set on getting famous, but he's holding us back, and you fucking know it!"
I was furious, and everything that I'd been thinking over the past few weeks just lashed out. And Stuart hadn't even really done bad today, which had lead to John just praising Stu like he was the best fucking bassist ever.
So maybe I was jealous, but still. We needed a new bassist.
I was furious, and everything that I'd been thinking over the past few weeks just lashed out. And Stuart hadn't even really done bad today, which had lead to John just praising Stu like he was the best fucking bassist ever.
So maybe I was jealous, but still. We needed a new bassist.


Comments
"If I said I want him here then he fucking stays here!" I threw him back against a wall and shouted. "I don't fucking care if you don't get me, Paul."
I stepped closer and jabbed my finger into his chest.
"You either follow what I say or you can fucking leave."
I didn't get why he had something so against Stu but it was seriously beginning to get on my nerve. He was such a whiny shit sometimes.
"How would you know what he wants? You don't know shit about him!" I backed away from him and started pacing.
"You're the fucking one who's so bloody goddamn selfish! And you're nothing but a fucking show off. Look at me! Look at me! I'm Paul bloody fucking Mccartney."
I seethed and searched for a cigarette.
I stopped and looked at him. He was jealous. It was all over his face, but why the hell was he jealous as if this was all some kind of...relationship?
That only pissed me off more. But...it made me nervous too.
"What do you mean by that? You've always acted like an ass to him, so what's it really all about then? You got something you're hiding, Paul?" I lit my cigarette and took a slow step towards him.
"You're jealous. Fucking jealous as a girl. What the fuck's wrong with you, Paul? You queer or something?"
He'd been a fucking pouf this whole time and I'd had no idea. How was that possible?
"I think that sounds more like you're little fantasy. Something you're dreaming up in your head." I pushed him slightly.
"And you're jealous it's not you, aren't you? Jealous you're not the one sucking my cock?" I grinned. I pushed his shoulder again and he fell back into the wall.
"Never thought you'd end up wanting it." I grinned. "But then, when you've got a mouth like yours, and a face like a girl's I guess you just end up wanting to bend over and take it, yeah?"
I was going to far...but it was fun.
"My ways, huh? I'm not the one acting like a jealous little girl." I grinned. He was getting worked up and there was something I liked about it.
I gripped the waistband of his pants and pulled him off the wall. I turned his back to mine and gripped a handful of his hair. Shit....this felt good.
"Is this what you're thinking about?" I whispered in his ear and bent him forward; rolling my hips into his butt and then--I froze. Faltered for just a second.
What was I doing?
I glanced down at his back and felt my skin warm. I pushed him away from me suddenly and stood back. Wiping my hand down my thigh.
"Shit, Paul." I looked around and ran my fingers through my hair. I lit a cigarette nervously and watched him.
"Just lay off the whole Stu thing, alright?"
Oh, god.
I felt frozen until he pushed me away, and I stood up straight. I was so ashamed, so angry.
"F-fuck you, John," I hissed, my vision becoming blurry. I had to get away from him. I turned to the door and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind me.
"Paul! Paul, come back. I was only joking!" I moved out the door and ran after him catching his arm and pulled him to a stop.
"Look, stop! I was kidding, Mccartney!" I said holding his arm. I knew I'd gone a little too far with this, but really...I just wanted to touch him more.
"I'm not a fucking queer," was all I could think to say. I hated myself for the images in my head. John bending me over again, but this time not to mock me.
I shivered at the thought, becoming even angrier.
Yes, I wanted him. But he would never get me to admit it.
I squinted at him and shook my head; waving him off in a short manner.
"I know, I know. Don't get your knickers in a twist. You started calling me one first anyhow. It's--not really like that." I glanced to the floor.
Sometimes I'd wanted it to be but Stu had fallen for Astrid before I'd had much of a chance to do...a lot.
"With Stu, I mean." I sighed and took a few backward steps towards our room. "I've got a bit of scotch, why don't we have a drink, yeah?"
"Yeah, sure." I walked back to our rooms, leaving the door open for John. I sat down on the bed and dragged a hand over my face. Fuck, I really needed a drink.
"Here, have drink. Make sure you tuck it back nice and good there, laddie!" I said in mock accent. Sitting down next to him I held out the bottle after taking a sniff of it.
"Strong stuff there. It was cheap as shit and I think someone might've made it in their bathtub." I grinned. "I'm not even really sure it's scotch."
"Damn, I think I might have underestimated you, Johnny," I said with a laugh and took another drink.
"Don't feel to badly about it, son." I said and took a large swig. Oh but this was heavy stuff. I'd have him in drunk in no time. Wait, what?
I shook my head and winced at the feel of the alchol. I shouldn't be thinking like that.
"You know, Paulie. Stu likes you and all...maybe you should just give him a break. It's hard having to keep juggling the two of you." I took another swig and then handed it back.
"It'll all work out, you know."
"It's just annoying having him fuck up all the time and you acting like it's nothing, but when George or I fuck up it's the end of the world." I handed him back the bottle.
He always got wonderfully flushed when he was drunk.
"Well I expect him to fuck up. You and George though," I paused and shrugged. I took another drink and then leaned back against the bunk railing. Bringing my knee up to rest my arm on.
"It's different is all."
"No, it's not," I grumbled, though I really didn't want to fight again.
"Well you're better than he is aren't you?" I snapped a little at him without even meaning to.
"Nevermind, look it's just...you mean something different to me and Stu, well..." I dropped off and sighed. I reached for the bottle and took another swig.
I felt heated and a little dizzy. Well that's what cheap stuff was good for, getting you done up right.
"He probably won't even be around much longer anyways. He's getting all infatuated with that bird. So you'll have your way in the end, Macca."
"Well, when Stu leaves you're going to turn into the biggest prick in the world, I can see it." I took the bottle from John, and carefully tipped it back to my mouth, trying to pour it while I still was on my back.
I missed at first, but opened my mouth wider, then sat the bottle on my stomach. Hah, fuck. I laughed lightly and wiped at my mouth with the back of my hand.
I picked it up and let my fingers rub heavily over his belly button. I pushed him slightly with my knee and nodded at him.
"Slide over. You're hogging the bed you see." I grinned and fell back next to him. Pressing closer then I needed to. I just wanted to see what'd he'd do. He probably wouldn't think anything of it.
"I'm already the biggest prick in the world, Macca. What do you mean you can see it? What do you think I'm going to do?" I asked and took another swig from the bottle.